Finally, the long-awaited award is here. Thank God to the organizers and our cyber legal team who worked hard to stop Bababoyz and his Ido Motor Park boys from threatening our staff, further. We had to put it on hold and changed the venue. So watch out for the agbero, he’s a jail breaker and might sneak in to destroy the evening.
Boy, I’m just having fun. Ain’t no business like showbusiness if you know what I mean. What’s up with this Chris “Give me the Money” Uba guy? It’s really amazing how an 8th grade dropout is running the show in Anambra State. Where is Rudolf and the egghead Okenwa Nwosu when Uba is tearing their state apart?
It might interest you guys to know that the well-respected commentator in the house is a woman wrapper. Yes, Ukaobasi is a woman wrapper and I can prove it. Oh, by the way, I have a transcript of Bababoyz’ complex court trial. Here we go:
The Trial of Bababoyz Court Marshall: All rise, the court is now in session.
Judge: We are here today for Cyber case Number 45234J03 on charges of drunken driving, embezzlement, graft and spousal abuse against Bababoyz. Why was Bababoyz released after four hours when you have all these charges leveled against him.
Prosecutor: Your honor, before his release, we did not have adequate information on his previous arrests and warrants for jumping jail.
Judge: Would his warrants not show upon his arrest?
Prosecutor: Your honor, his warrants were crimes he committed across state lines so we could not pull out the information at that time.
Judge: Bababoyz, how do you plead your case?
Bababoyz: Not guilty, your honor.
Prosecutor: The defendant is guilty of all the charges leveled against him. First we must take account of him jumping jail and running away from the authorities. Adding insult to injury, he was caught driving under the influence and resisting arrest.
Judge: Bababoyz, based on the shred of evidence presented to the court, in my own opinion and beyond reasonable doubt, I found you guilty of all the charges. You are to spend twenty years in a cyber maximum security prison and would be eligible for parole in twelve years with good behavior.
Bababoyz: Ejoo, se Bolanle owanle?
Judge: What the hell is he saying?
Bababoyz: Amugbo judge ni, abi oti sha igbo?
Judge: Take him away!
Bababoyz: Araoke, araoke, araoke araoke! Amugbo judge oti baje everything oh. See me wahala oh! Araoke, araoke, araoke, araoke!
Well, that was Bababoyz funny trial. Yeah, CSE got it going on. Thanks to his Podiatrist fiancé who took care of his gangarene sore foot. CSE, how do you like those good looking nails? I like the guy though. A perfect gentleman but people like that can be dangerous. Ijeommaanuuntu is at it again. She has joined the brand of married Dallas women who flirt around with Ednut and Ukaobasi just for a plate of peppersoup. Imagine!
We have a full house tonight. Addy is flirting with Yvette while Idowu Ogbo is busy rolling the kronic stuff in between his hands. Who said that shitty stuff ain’t gonna knock you down? Ask Chiboy, Fat Boy, Dikeanatuegwu, Mota Ogallala, Joe Onwuatuegwu, Tijani, Wacko, Nwa Asaba, Ricky, Malcolm X, Wind, Waypoint1Biafra, Bamidele, Okwyonwuka, Chudi Sokie Odili, Nwa Aro, Mobolaji Aluko, Nwa Biafra, Usman Kadiri, Opon Ifa, Ukaobasi, Regina, Ijeomaannuntu, Rudek30May, Boy Ajasco, Jude Olisa and Ogbunigwe. I also suspect Ohafia “Fathead” Udumeze is into stoning. So you stoners should take it easy. That stuff ain’t right for your body. Just don’t do it!
Yep, we are at it again, the 3rd annual message board awards. I wonder who the winners would be. Ladies and gentlemen of cyberspace, it is my pleasure to introduce the one and only Yvette Richardson who performs tonight. The audience cheers Yvette, Yvette, Yvette, go Yvette, go Yvette!
Yvette: It’s really good to be here tonight. I love this place and you guys are awesome. Ammo sing an inspirational melody for y’all. Whoo boy, Y’all bin jamming.
Wake up everybody, no more sleeping in bed No more backward thinking, time for thinking ahead The world change so very much for what it use to be There is so much hatred, war and poverty
(Chorus): The world wont get no better If we just let it be The world wont get no better We better change it…just you and me….
Boy oh boy, this is fantastic. Ladies and Gentlemen, it’s time to present the 3rd Annual Cyber Message Board Awards:
Best Writer: Nominees: Ijeommannuntu, Ukaobasi, Ohafia “Fathead” Udumeze, Damian, Teddy and Patrick.
Winner: Ohafia “Fathead” Udumeze for his volume of commentaries.
Best Mischievous Writer: Nominees: Opon “Hit and Run” Ifa, Bamidele, Mota Ogallala, Udonsit and Rudek30May.
Winner: Bamidele
Best Intellectual: Nominees: Onyema, CSE, Tunde Onabanjo, Ohafia “Fathead” Udumeze, Jude Olisa and “Big Daddy” I.G. Nwafor.
Winner: CSE for his quality of write-ups and analysis.
Best Poet: Nominees: Olugbuo Nwoke, Chinyere, and Ohafia “Fathead” Udumeze
Winner: Chinyere for “The Cult of True Womanhood.”
Best New comers: Nominees: Addy, Oshamblo, Mota Ogallala, Idowu Ogbo, Okennunu, Ejiro Sakpo, Umuibe and Aka_ka_Aka.
Winner: Addy for his energy and fierce debates.
Best News Reporters: Nominees: Egwuatu Ozoemena, Ednut “the snake” Ukaobasi, Ohafia “Fathead” Udumeze, Nwa Biafra and Nwa Aro.
Winner: Ukaobasi for his news analysis and commentary in Ngige and Uba debacle.
Best Sports Analyst: Nominees: Waypoint1Biafra, Thompson Buraimoh, Kunle, Ednut “the snake” and Wacko.
Winner: Thompson Buraimoh,Soccer Gazette
Best Legal Analyst: Nominees: Tunde Onabanjo, Jude Olisa, Adaeze, NwaBiafra, Ogbunigwe, Opon Ifa and Nwa Asaba
Winner: Adaeze as counsel to BLM.
Best Music Analyst: Nominees: Thompson Buraimoh, Biafra, Imalazi, Ambrose, Ohafia “Fathead” Udumeze, Onumaraekwu and COLO.
Winner: Thompson Buraimoh for his extended music coverage and analysis.
Best Psycho Analyst: Nominees: Waypoint1Biafra, Nwa Aro, Joe Onwuatuegwu, Seun , Ukaobasi, Joe Onwuatuegwu and Amadi O.
Winner: Waypoint1Biafra on Mobolaji Aluko and psychoanalysis.
Best Goofer: Nominees: Mota Ogallala, Bamidele, Bababoyz, Chi m, Adekunle, Ugali Shaga and Pastor Oriago Ibegbunam.
Winner: Mota Ogallala. He has goofed more than any member in this forum.
Best Counsel: Nkem E. Ejiofor, Ukaobasi, NwaBIafra, CSE, Ambrose, Biafra, Nwa Asaba and Damian.
Winner: Ukaobasi on his continuous commentary in finding a solution for his people of Biafra.
Best AWOL Member(s): Nominees: Wind, COLO, Adamu, Yara Wasa Bature, Chudi Sokie, Muda Kaduna, Vitalis, Adisa O, Zaiyol “Take that” Karl, Viagra, M. Ganiyu Adegboye, Amucha 1, Chike, Chi m, Onwudiwe, Ike, Odili, Ijeomannuntu Umaru Ibrahim and Gtorino.
Winner: Addy, Sylva and Chiboy. They’ve talked more tribal politics than any forum member.
Best Messageboard:[b] Biafranigeriaworld, NGEX, Kanoonline, CNN, Nigerianation, Naijamall, Nigeriaworld and Kunle’s Egbe Omo Oduduwa Forum.
Winner: [b]Biafranigeriaworld.
Best One liner(s): Nominees: Mota Ogallala, Bababoyz, Dave, Ednut, NwaBiafra, Williamson, Usman Kadiri, Tijani, Nwokeoma, Muda Kaduna and Yinka.
Winner: Mota Ogallala. He has caused more confusion with his brainless oneliner.
Lady Biafranigeria: Blessing takes the award for her fair and balanced write-ups.
Man of the Year Award: Nominees: Ohafia “Fathead” Udumeze, Ukaobasi, Bababoyz, Usman Kadiri, Nwa Asaba, Ednut, Chiboy, Sylva, Addy, Ojoto, Joe Onwuatuegwu and Odili.
Winner: Ednut “the Snake.”
Lifetime Achievement Award: The Webmaster and Founder(s) of Biafranigeriaworld.
Ladies and Gentlemen, in accepting my own two awards, I would like to express my profound gratitude to My Creator, who made it possible, my friends at Biafranigeriaworld Forum and the Webmaster who works around the clock to keep the forum going.
posted
Thanks TB. As this is the year of Egbo-Egbo justice, I have already taken out an injunction restraining, constraining,confusing and preventing more deserving candidates from challenging my victory.
Posts: 621 | Registered: Mar 2001
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I'm a big fan of yours. You may not think so after you read this, but I am. And it's precisely because I am a fan that has seen things that you can do and things that you can't do. One writer said it somewhere "you are a rare gem" and I believe them.
For that reason, I'm accepting my two awards in good faith and hope you will continue to bring humor to the forum. Keep up the good work.
All the best,
My name is Mota Ogallala Tekumseh, the proud native American
___________________ The greatest thing about America is the right to disagree with the power structure without fear of torture or death at the hands of the government Posts: 217 | From: Ogallala, Nebraska, USA | Registered: May 2003
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OkaObasi, I think my English/Igbo dictonary says that It means that [i] a woman can take you and basically run you and turn you into a yes madam type of a guy.
___________________ Feel me? Ofu onye ana asi unu abia go. - Ednut Igbo-American . www.airamericaradio.com visit her. Posts: 2447 | From: Mother Earth | Registered: Mar 2001
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posted
TB Na wa for you o. for a while there i thought that Obasanjo have rigged this year's Cyber award, just about the time I was ready to make that allegation you came through. Only you can pull it off TB.
Forget the foul-mouthed NwaBiafra. An interview with Ukaobasi would be interesting. Don't you think so? I can't wait.
Posts: 150 | From: Abuja, Nigeria | Registered: Dec 2002
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quote: Best Mysterious Members: Nominees: Mota Ogallala, Ralph Njoku, Ranka Dede, Malcolm X, Looma Farris, Idowu, Okennunu, Egede 1 and Ejiro Sakpo.
Winners: Ralph Njoku, Mota Ogallala and Okennunu whose origin is unknown
TB na wah for you.
Anyway, word from BiafraNigeria(this can be comfirmed by visiting their website) is that INEC has overturned the results and have awarded to Okennunu, the Man of the year award! Do I hear an amen from addy?
Ednut, if you dont like it you can go to the tribunal. I know that I have not made as many posts as you have, but brother INEC works in mysterious ways.
Posts: 8 | From: Orlando, Florida. | Registered: Apr 2002
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Thanks so much for recognizing the power of women, though the male chauvinists of this world would not agree with you.
Love the truth; it ultimately bows to no master or the women haters. As we know, even if the sexists on this board tends to ignore it, a woman by God's mercy serves dual functions, as a woman and nurse. We labor and feel the pains, nurture and wean all the would be women haters of Biafranigeria.
Once again, thank you and keep up the good work.
___________________ Jesus is Lord Posts: 96 | From: Dallas, Texas | Registered: Aug 2002
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posted
First, I thank TB and the academy for nominating me for anything at all. But, it's a good thing I did not win as I know absolutely nothing about psychoanalysis. But, I will not let my lack of knowledge in the field stop me since the title "Psychoanalyst" sounds sexy and I have a godfather extraordinaire, Babboo, who will make sure that I get what I want.
So, I am taking the following steps:
1) I will request an Egbo-Egbo injuction seeking to stop Waypoint1Biafra from parading himself as the Best Psychoanalyst,
2) I will take Waypoint to his own godfather's shrine, where his godfather's agberos will slap him around a few times and remind him that he previously signed a letter of resignation because that was what the ultimate baba godfather in Ajuba wanted, to make baba develope confidence in his psychoanalysis,
3) If Waypoint fails to resign as agreed under voodoo, I will arrange for the AIG, Y, to take two hundred men to Waypoint's office to take him away to a toilet for his protection.
4) While he is gone, he will read his resignation and the forum will make me Best Psychoanalyst for 5-hours while baba godfather is out of the country and before assistant babboo steps in.
5) I could go on, but you catch my drift.
___________________ You ain't seen nothing yet Posts: 150 | Registered: Mar 2001
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posted
Though I was not nominated in any category, I bear no grudges and congratulate all the winners.
Posts: 33 | From: Madras, India | Registered: Mar 2003
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quote:Best Mysterious Members: Nominees: Mota Ogallala, Ralph Njoku, Ranka Dede, Malcolm X, Looma Farris, Idowu, Okennunu, Egede 1 and Ejiro Sakpo.
Winners: Ralph Njoku, Mota Ogallala and Okennunu whose origin is unknown
Oke nnunu, yall got it. Male bird or Big Bird or Strong Bird. I guess TB the mystery is now gone about this guy that with F-O-U-R posts wants INEC or is it that ugly looking Egbo-Egbo to declare him man of the year.
___________________ Feel me? Ofu onye ana asi unu abia go. - Ednut Igbo-American . www.airamericaradio.com visit her. Posts: 2447 | From: Mother Earth | Registered: Mar 2001
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posted
Hi TB, I do not know that Cyberforum can be this fun !!But you used PDP style and INEC formula to out rig me. Presently there is this Injuction that was granted in Abuja court restraining you from making public your Findings ,and you are requested to WABARA- UMUIBE, or I.G OF POLICE [IDIOT GENERAL OF POLICE] will request his share upfront from you or you will be seeing and hearing Bomb blast at your door mouth. I have made alternative arrangement ,incase the injunction should be denied i week later,then DOGFATHERS will interfere and this should be resolved as inter-forum affairs ,which might make somebody like MOTA OGALLALA become the new Moderator [even if it is for five hours] . Dont even think about asking the head of thieves [sorry head of state]to interfere, because he is not in town and he might not be aware of this injunction ,unless there is another trouble in Sao Tome & Liberia. Dont count on your connections oh !! because the senators also stay in prison[ask Omisore] or ask MORRIS IBEKWE of 419 caucus. Revisit the result now ,before things started happening like in my own Dear State [dont ask me which one]
Umuibe
___________________ Biafra is not part of nIGERIA but a nation on the making. Posts: 66 | From: BIAFRA | Registered: May 2003
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posted
TB, Dis one wey una com dash me spin doctor now, i hope say noh be bribe una wan bribe me buy my silence, biko, Umuibe, make una dash me one alias make i take corner Buraimoh or na Jimoh sef before una Biafra nation on the making go com become reality, wey man pikin no go come see una again, as una master Chukwugorije and Kainkain Ofona-ogogoro go com co-opt una go capital Awka go become minister of misinformation.
Though some may see it differently, me think there's no winner or loser in this Cyber award-giving ceremony. For take it or leave it, one thing is sure; anyone who spends his/her hard-earned money and ever dwindling time to make a post on this board (whether as a "goofer" or as "counsellor") has made this village a better and more developed place. So let the losers decorate the "winners" and let the latter wear their crown with HUMILITY.
What is important is that we mean well to ourselves and to humanity in general.
One again, thanks once more Mr. TB., till next year, keep watching and counting.
Posts: 997 | From: Germany | Registered: Mar 2001
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