posted
Ordering Pizza in 2008 *********************
Operator: "Thank you for calling Pizza Hut. May I have your national ID number?"
Customer: "Hi, I'd like to place an order."
Operator: "I must have your NIDN first, sir?"
Customer: "My National ID Number, yeah, hold on, eh, it's 6102049998-45-54610."
Operator: "Thank you, Mr. Sheehan. I see you live at 1742 Meadowland Drive, and the phone number's 494-2366. Your office number over at Lincoln Insurance is 745-2302 and your cell number's 266-2566. Email address is sheehan@ <mailto:sheehan@homenet.net> home.net Which number are you calling from, sir?"
Customer: "Huh? I'm at home. Where d'ya get all this information?"
Operator: "We're wired into the HSS, sir."
Customer: "The HSS, what is that?"
Operator: "We're wired into the Homeland Security System, sir. This will add only 15 seconds to your ordering time"
Customer: (Sighs) "Oh, well, I'd like to order a couple of your All-Meat Special pizzas."
Operator: "I don't think that's a good idea, sir."
Customer: "Whaddya mean?"
Operator: "Sir, your medical records and commode sensors indicate that you've got very high blood pressure and extremely high cholesterol. Your National Health Care provider won't allow such an unhealthy choice."
Customer "What makes you think I'd like something like that?"
Operator: "Well, you checked out 'Gourmet Soybean Recipes' from your local library last week, sir. That's why I made the suggestion."
Customer: "All right, all right. Give me two family-sized ones, then."
Operator: "That should be plenty for you, your wife and your four kids, and your 2 dogs can finish the crusts, sir. Your total is $49.99."
Customer: "Lemme give you my credit card number."
Operator: "I'm sorry sir, but I'm afraid you'll have to pay in cash. Your credit card balance is over its limit."
Customer: "I'll run over to the ATM and get some cash before your driver gets here."
Operator: "That won't work either, sir. Your checking account's overdrawn also."
Customer: "Never mind! Just send the pizzas. I'll have the cash ready. How long will it take?"
Operator: "We're running a little behind, sir. It'll be about 45 minutes, sir. If you're in a hurry you might want to pick 'em up while you're out getting the cash, but then, carrying pizzas on a motorcycle can be a little awkward."
Customer: "Wait! How do you know I ride a scooter?"
Operator: "It says here you're in arrears on your car payments, so your car got repo'ed. But your Harley's paid for and you just filled the tank yesterday"
Customer: Well I'll be a "@#%/$@&?#!"
Operator : "I'd advise watching your language, sir. You've already got a July 4, 2006 conviction for cussing out a cop and another one I see here on September for contempt at your hearing for cussing at a judge." "Oh yes I see here that you just got out from a 90 day stay in the State Correctional Facility. Is this your first pizza since your return to society?
Customer: (Speechless)
Operator: "Will there be anything else, sir?"
Customer: "Yes, I have a coupon for a free 2 liter of Coke".
Operator: "I'm sorry sir, but our ad's exclusionary clause prevents us from offering free soda to diabetics. The New Constitution prohibits this.
Thank you for calling Pizza Hut!"
Posts: 155 | Registered: Mar 2001
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posted
You know the "@#%/$@&?#!" is true I had the BS already happen to me but not to that degree it was in Chico Calif 1992 When I made a call to Dominoes Pizza .The guy on the other end of the phone knew who I was and asked me to comfirm the address which he rattled off to me. I was like Dammmn The other thing was my atm card after withdraw announced my name out loud thanking me.
[ May 03, 2004, 09:31 AM: Message edited by: nigeria ]
Posts: 107 | From: North Dakota USA | Registered: Apr 2004
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I will tell you. Chico is beautiful It is a college town and every year during Oct 31 the students dress up for the halloween celebration and there are amazing places to go, as all towns offer something wonderful and exciting.
There are walls made of stone that have been hand placed by the Chinese, they used to hide their gold & anything of value within these rocks which they themselves built they due to the slavery issue. Oak trees bordered many a landmark of the many chinese walls
The wall must be dry laid stone. This means no mortar was used. When you check for this there will be no mortar between the stones. They were built this way to allow the stones to expand with the freezing of winter and then settle back with the thaw.
I myself used to go snorkling. I would get up early & go down by the covered bridge and get right into that freezing water. I found much under the water there. For example, I saw where the Maidu Indians had once lived very close to the water for I found the grinding stones which were covered by water that were in fact hollowed out to serve as a morter and pestal when pounding what ever type of food was pulverized. Like this can go on forever . I should stop. But before I do did you read what I posted about once in a life time? It was in reguards of a slave cave I onced discovered in Erlanger Ky . Well I do get around don't I
[ May 28, 2004, 04:16 PM: Message edited by: nigeria ]
Posts: 107 | From: North Dakota USA | Registered: Apr 2004
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Please let it. I am getting informed. I might be visiting the city soon and need to know where to visit.
I should stop.
Don’t stop Nigeria. Why do you use that handle? Makes another think of you as a male.
But before I do did you read what I posted about once in a life time? It was in reguards of a slave cave I onced discovered in Erlanger Ky . Well I do get around don't I
No I haven’t gotten to it yet. Could you properly direct me to where to find it? I’ma wanna read it.
TGIF. AUDI A6 BLACK WITH GETTO RIMS FOR EFFECTS
___________________ Feel me? Ofu onye ana asi unu abia go. - Ednut Igbo-American . www.airamericaradio.com visit her. Posts: 2450 | From: Mother Earth | Registered: Mar 2001
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posted
Ednut: Ok here it is Chico >> Bidwell Park One Mile Dam Recreation Area Esplanade. Chico, Calif Take a drive going to Paradise. so you can see the canyon it is truly amazing & unexpected. One mile is where the Robin Hood Movie starring Eryoll Flynn was filmed because of the huge trees. I would go there knowing the story and imagine him riding through as he was being chased. If you go to the park take a pen & some paper for sometimes, suddenly day dreaming brings about creativity and within a moment you could get caught up by the breeze of the day. Chico did captivate my heart not the city itself but the parks. I used to go gigging with the asians yep i did . I walked the waters of the 1 mile creek at night with a flashlight and captured many frogs yes i did & prepared them as well. I learned much from those wonderful people. I always felt that I needed to learn from them to know what they knew. I will say this, they will never starve, nor will I. The green alge in the waters just the tips are taken in the spring to be prepared as what is compared to spinach. It is pulverized first & rinsed what seems like forever.
Chapmantown, this is where i onced lived, it is named after a black man who was the oldest living resident that had lived there . Well that is what I was told. Chapman Town is the only community in Chico with significant cultural diversity. While the majority of residents are of European backgrounds, Mexican Americans, Laotian Americans, Hmong Americans, African Americans and more, all live in this small community with few racial tensions & I loved it.
Chico Enterprise-Record. The marijuana plants towered more than 17 feet high, visible over the roof of the shabby shack off of Wisconsin Street in Chapmantown ...Well this was added because Chico soil is so fertile anything can grow even a 17ft marijuana plant
Hula's Chinese Barbecue Restaurant I always loved it you may too.
African Americans in Chico Back when Go here and browse by subject keywords choose the African Americans http://cricket.csuchico.edu/spcfotos/keywords4.html it is truly interesting I have always been a lover of African American art & photos
Also in case you want to kick it & just possibly find a good deal, see if you can find Major Van storage sales located on Cherry street . It is a place where you will find almost anything for the man bids on unpaid storages & then sells things to the public. I bought hugh book the size of a Bible dated 1887 .Truly a moment of Grace. Holy writings, it had belonged to a black family for it has many pictures & info. Getting kind of sad here remembering many things. But I had to leave for I dream dreams that are prophetic.
One more thing the slave cave article I wrote is located Under Say it anyway it is the fifth one down ( Once in a lifetime something unusual happens)
And at last but may we not forget Gold's Gym 931 W 5th St. Chico, CA 95928 Tel: (530) 893-GOLD LOL
Posts: 107 | From: North Dakota USA | Registered: Apr 2004
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